Monkey Diaries Archive

What's the most annoying thing in the world? If I had to choose, I'd say it's the inability to make a decision. Standing in line to grab a sandwich moments ago, a woman (isn't it always a woman?) looked up and down at the menu while fifteen hungry people waited behind her. She hemmed. She hawed. She read each listing on the menu carefully, finally deciding on a sandwich. She asked about what was on it (which was infuriating in so much as the menu listed exactly what was in the sandwich), she asked whether she could make a substitution (another ridiculously stupid question since the sign above the menu stated, NO SUBSTITUTIONS), and finally, asked if she could see what the sandwich looked like when it was finished. Then she changed her mind and went through the whole process again. A simple process that should have taken less than three minutes became a possibly life altering event! To top things all off, she then searched in her purse for the correct change. If there is a god, she will choke, die and prevent her genetic code from polluting the gene pool.